They make teeth out of old piano keys for elderly cows

[alexsarll]

Somehow, that was a very productive weekend. I finished Joseph Conrad's The Secret Agent (a little reductive, but still far too familiar for a 99-year old book*), and Flann O'Brien's The Third Policeman (from which my head is still reeling). I read the first seven books of Nemesis the Warlock (Pat Mills' script is all over the place, but it's a crime that so much excellent Bryan Talbot and Kevin O'Neill artwork is out of print) and an Alan Moore Spirit story even better than Eisner's. I watched Kenneth Tynan: In Praise Of Hardc0re (of whose arguments certain people should probably be reminded), The Iron Giant (I know now why nicklocking cries), the entertainingly dire Cruel Intentions 2 (which defies normal film practice by being an utter mess redeemed by its ending), and both Airplane films (even better than I remembered). I explored Walthamstow village, ate pizza, realised Popstarz is the most purist club I attend, and saw a newly shorn Philip Jeays do a wonderful show (with a rare, welcome showing by 'Richenda') in spite of sharing a bill with dullards and fools. I also saw plenty of my favourite deviants...pseudo-humans...weirdoes.

One of the best television shows ever made returns to Channel 4 tonight; not that you'd know it, because Oz is as ever being tucked away in the small hours, thrown away at a rate of three episodes a week, *wasted*. If you're planning to watch it, I strongly suggest checking all listings against the C4 site, because last time they couldn't even keep to their own already-insulting schedule and ensured that even a video-setting obsessive like myself managed to miss an episode.

Normally, the first time I hear each new Missy Elliott single is like catching some particularly virulent superbug, which then haunts me for weeks. So how come my system fought off 'Teary Eyed' like it was a particularly halfhearted sniffle?

My guess as to the switched transmissions of Absolute Power looks to have been dead on; there was some very dodgy editing around an unusually unfunny Clare Short joke, suggesting that it was a hasty replacement for a Mo Mowlam gag now deemed unacceptable.

If any of you are fans of the SF author James Lovegrove, his new book didn't do much for me and so is available on application.

*"The imbecile bourgeoisie of this country make themselves the accomplices of the very people whose aim is to drive them out of their houses to starve in ditches."

Comments

[stu-n.livejournal.com]

Been to Mondragone, then?

[barrysarll.livejournal.com]

No, back down to Finsbury Park for Pappagone (which I don't consider Porchetta's equal, but which is directly under my flat).

[setting-sun.livejournal.com]

Uh oh.... *desperately tries to resist Airplane! quoting feast*

Have you ever been in a Turkish prison?

[barrysarll.livejournal.com]

If thermaland were on during the day, we'd be doomed.

Re: Have you ever been in a Turkish prison?

[thermaland.livejournal.com]

The very first draft apparently included the line "Timmy, have you ever sucked a grown man's c0ck?". Surprisingly this was changed almost immediately.

Re: Have you ever been in a Turkish prison?

[barrysarll.livejournal.com]

Yes, I spotted that on the imdb link. Shame, really.

fvck the fvcking fvckers

[atommickbrane.livejournal.com]

I love Flann O'Brien more than anything. Given a choice between flan, the rubbish pudding, and Flann O'B, well, it's no choice, at all. I know he certainly used to appear in three different incarnations on my interests list but I can't remember if I changed that or not.

Re: fvck the fvcking fvckers

[barrysarll.livejournal.com]

I think on the whole I preferred At Swim Two Birds (I can never remember how many hyphens it has), but this was still damn good. Even if it did leave me with trouble getting to sleep.

Re: fvck the fvcking fvckers

[atommickbrane.livejournal.com]

I was all ready to start a poll on the "best" Myles but sadly I realise that not everyone has read all the books which makes me rather sad.

(Despite having read them I don't actually OWN most of 'em - libraries and borrowed copies and LOST copies R us)

Re: fvck the fvcking fvckers

[barrysarll.livejournal.com]

This was only my second, and yet I fear that would still leave me ahead of most of your flist. It's lonely being a fan and a fast reader, isn't it?

Re: fvck the fvcking fvckers

[atommickbrane.livejournal.com]

Speaking of which, I've nearly finished the Christopher Fowler book - a lunchtime in the "park" might complete it - do you have any more? Bryant & May are brilliant but it took the weekend's events to make me realise they're based on a bloody bad Queen pun (or if not, the dude should have REALISED).

Re: fvck the fvcking fvckers

[barrysarll.livejournal.com]

I thought Bryant & May was a brand of matches?

I have, but have not read, 77 Clocks, which comes after Water Room but is a flashback to the seventies. You are welcome to borrow it, but will have to keep quiet about its contents because I've not read it yet, nor has it been released.

Re: fvck the fvcking fvckers

[atommickbrane.livejournal.com]

I shall start resembling a church mouse I shall be so quiet.

Re: fvck the fvcking fvckers

[atommickbrane.livejournal.com]

Do church mice's* squeaks start resembling choirboy squeaks as an attempt at aural/oral** camoflage***?

*GRAMMAR
**WHICH ONE
**SPELLING

Re: fvck the fvcking fvckers

[barrysarll.livejournal.com]

Well, it would be both, wouldn't it? Because the squeaks come out of their mouths, and into others' ears. It is a most confounded pancake.

Re: fvck the fvcking fvckers

[atommickbrane.livejournal.com]

Well yes, so I thought, then I thought, and then I thought, and then I got confused, and is it lunchtime yet? And can I have pancakes?

Re: fvck the fvcking fvckers

[barrysarll.livejournal.com]

Well, I just ate mine. And given where you work there must be somewhere serving pancakes within range, though I cannot vouch for anywhere in particular.

Re: fvck the fvcking fvckers

[atommickbrane.livejournal.com]

Haha there is always the McPancake wotsit which IS actually made of plastic, quite the amazing.

Re: fvck the fvcking fvckers

[p-dan-tic.livejournal.com]

I thought he was the guitarest in queen

Re: fvck the fvcking fvckers

[barrysarll.livejournal.com]

I honestly hadn't thought of the Brian May connection 'til Brane mentioned it, having instantly picked up on the matches (http://web.ukonline.co.uk/arcadia.bell/Swan/swan1.htm) gag and thought it a bit cringeworthy.

Re: fvck the fvcking fvckers

[boyofbadgers.livejournal.com]

The plain people of Ireland: do one poll!

Re: fvck the fvcking fvckers

[atommickbrane.livejournal.com]

It would be worse than my PEOTRIE poll for responses though, innit!

(I was tempted to borrow the WCW book from Tim Tim's on Saturday but, er, was distracted by the far more interesting Transport in Peckham and Nunhead. CANAL IS DUG).

[katstevens.livejournal.com]

I have Lost! I have Lost!

Yet cannot watch it!

Rage!

[barrysarll.livejournal.com]

You realise that this frustration is the penalty for tommymack's gloating on the matter?

[the-roofdog.livejournal.com]

Yes, I've told you why you can't watch it. You can't watch it because every Wednesday night we're going to make biscuits and settle down in front of the TV to watch it like a proper family. Now give me that DVD.

[beingjdc.livejournal.com]

He's been doing richenda loads when I've seen him lately actually. Well, at Luton I think and at the last two Greenham shows. DO you have e-mail from me? You should.

[barrysarll.livejournal.com]

I do, thank you. There will be a response at some point.

[the-roofdog.livejournal.com]

Ooo, thanks for the Oz alert !