No matter how you try you'll never be as cheap as me

[alexsarll]

Surely I cannot be the only person who finds the wolves in the anti-Kerry campaign ad absolutely adorable? The same goes for the bear in Reagan's 1984 attack ads. They look so bright-eyed, fluffy and loveable!
(Oh, and if the Secret Service is reading this - yes, I would gladly take any opportunity which came my way to take that scumball usurper of a so-called President out. But then so would most people outside the US and a significant proportion of those within. That's a lot of houses to doorstep, so you'd best make a start, eh?)

Reading Hellblazer while listening to Strangelove is not a recipe for happiness. However, Constantine's teenage demon daughter has now joined Christopher Chance and She-Hulk in my (current, for I am fickle) top three fictional crushes. Wrong? Moi? Surely not.

Like most males, I grew up wanting to be James Bond. Die Another Day is not as bad as I've been lead to believe, but I still don't think it's exactly a shining ornament to the canon. The idea of a villain remodelling himself as Bond is a good one, and Toby Stephens played it brilliantly, but the script had moments of utter cringeworthiness. Have some of them delivered by Halle Berry, who can't even carry a decent script, and you have Cringe Squared. The invisible car was less incongruous than I'd expected, and I loved the supercar versus supercar battle, but most of the CGI effects were atrocious (especially in the tsunami scene). And as for the twist - I should have remembered that any Bond girl I fancy is evil.

Turned over during ITV's news break to catch an unusually cheering Newsnight. OK, so I missed the promised report by Roger Mellie, but Yasser Arafat is critically ill and the EU is in disarray (with the dual side-benefits of upholding gay rights and spiting Berlusconi)! Hoopla! Hoopla!
(It amused me greatly that the Italian senator sticking up for homophobic asshole BUTTiglione looked so like the blond one from Queer Eye for the Straight Guy. And as for Mandelson saying "I don't think you can disbar people because they have religious-based views and convictions" - does that mean Abu Hamza could be made a Commissioner? Imbecile)

Comments

[razorcheekbones.livejournal.com]

"Morally disordered" is not a mood for you, it is a way of being.

[barrysarll.livejournal.com]

I know, but it was too marvellous a Buttiglione quote to miss.
Who owes whom mail, btw?

[razorcheekbones.livejournal.com]

I think I owe you. I have been trying to avoid the internet lately - this means I also end up avoiding email. Sorry about that. Will reply later today.

argh

[thermaland.livejournal.com]

Did you feel a surge of pride when your tanned MEP made a fool of himself in the European Parliament and was offered medication?

Re: argh

[barrysarll.livejournal.com]

He's not my MEP. He's no longer even under the same party whip as my MEP. But he's hardly the first politician to make a pillock of himself in pursuit of a leadership.

[london-imp.livejournal.com]

I saw Die Another Day at the cinema and even then I thought it was pretty crap, but then I really liked TWINE. DAD has the worst Bond theme ever (even worse they reward Madge with a cameo) whilst the script and some of the acting is terrible(Brosnan excluded of course).

Good choice of music there, i was listening to the very same song.

[barrysarll.livejournal.com]

It was on XFM just before I left the house.
Madonna's 'Die Another Day' is indeed dire - and totally inappropriate as a Bond theme (I wasn't too sure about the whole title sequence). Her cameo wasn't too bad, though not as lesbionic as I'd been led to expect.
I thought The World Is Not Enough was too much a retread of Tomorrow Never Dies, which I'd loved.

[wardytron.livejournal.com]

My take on the Buttglione thing is that the people baying for his blood can sod off, but I can't be @rsed fully to explain why. It's something to do with the context in which he said he didn't like gayers, ie that you have to distinguish between law and your own personal views. It's like Tony Blair saying he's a Whizz-Kid but as Prime Minister one has to be careful not to allow one's personal allegiances to shape policy, and must maintain a scrupulous neutrality between Whizz-Kids and Chip-Ites. And then pro-Chip-Ite MEPs missing the whole bloody point and demanding his resignation on the grounds that he's a Whizz-Kid. But to be honest the whole thing's really boring so I might have missed some of the story. Also, if I had a vote in the US election and it was being held this morning I'd vote for Bush.

[barrysarll.livejournal.com]

Why would you vote for Bush? It's not as if Kerry is actually a terrorist-loving hippy. He's essentially Bush minus the stupidity, the dodgy mates and the Born Again bit.

I agree that in principle you can have politicians whose views do not interfere with their duties - many of those responsible for legalising homosexuality didn't like it. But I get the impression that Butthead ain't one of them. Plus:
1) It's good to see homophobia graduaally becoming an *unacceptable* prejudice, like racism and sexism already are.
2) Anything which gets in the way of the European Commission is probably a good thing.

[bengraham.livejournal.com]

"Barry, this is the secret service calling. We suspect from comments you've made on the internet that you might be related to Lee Harvey Oswald. As a result, we're going to have to chop your hands off to prevent you doing anything stupid."

Have you seen 'Jay & Silent Bob Strike Back'? That's what the secret service should do - hire Jay & Silent Bob and give them a list of all the names and addresses of people they want beaten up!

[barrysarll.livejournal.com]

Funnily enough I just referenced it on a comment to someone else's journal...

I am very like Lee Harvey Oswald, in that I would like to shoot a US President but circumstances have prevented me from doing so.

[thermaland.livejournal.com]

And another mystery: why is the most visible security force in the world called "The Secret Service"?

[barrysarll.livejournal.com]

Because they wear shades, so no one can recognise them.

[publicansdecoy.livejournal.com]

Halle Berry was awful, except for the first 10 seconds or so of her being in that film.

I wanted to be like James Bond when I was a kid but now I think he's a smug, chauvinistic git. I still like the films though.

-x-

[johnnyvertigen.livejournal.com]

I wanted to be James Bond when I was a kid because he was a smug git. And had a tux where my 11 year old self had to settle for cords.

[barrysarll.livejournal.com]

She is quite attractive, but so dreadful that it overshadows her attractiveness.
Bond is indeed all that you say - but he's still pretty cool, as many females would agree.

[culturedgoat.livejournal.com]

I really liked the idea of Bond being captured and taken prisoner for a year, and I thought that was played out really well, and I found most of the film very enjoyable (Korea+Cuba scenes = classic!). But by the end it was getting a bit silly, the villain suddenly getting a robot suit for no particular reason, and a substantial section of the later part of the film devoted to Bond running away a lot.

But that Rosamund Pike eh? Cor!

xxx

[darkmarcpi.livejournal.com]

Yeah!

I so would.

(I've got a sword she can fence with, etc).

[barrysarll.livejournal.com]

Pretty much agree (though the robot suit did follow from the 'ergonomics' line to his inventor lackey). Having the pre-credits sequence *not* end with Bond's escape as it usually does was a nice twist on the formula.

[darkmarcpi.livejournal.com]

I like DAD enough to class it as my 2nd favourite Pierce Brosnan Bond film, after TND. My main criticisms are:
1) the fact that the whole self-referential thing going on with the nods to all the other Bond films is a bit tiresome and unecessary. I mean Bond films have (since the 70s anyway) generally been a parady of themselves, so trying to make the point even further just seems pointless. And the giant satellite laser thing - ripping off both Diamonds Are Forever and Goldeneye - didn't seem so much homage or knowing post-modernism, just an utterly lazy excuse for not having a decent enough plot.

2) The invisible car thing is just silly. They could have made it far more realistic by making the car almost invisible, in the same way as you can sort of see The Predator when he's invisible.

3) The theme tune - it's OK as a Madonna song but utterly unsuited to a Bond film.

4) Oh, and Halle Berry being dreadful.

You didn't watch The Power of Nightmares then?

[publicansdecoy.livejournal.com]

TND is the worst bond film I have seen!

-x-

[barrysarll.livejournal.com]

The little nods were OK but the satellite cannon was indeed a bit lazy.

As for the car - surely they did what you suggest? It ripples when it moves, or something moves past it. Not quite the MacGuffin I'd been expecting.

[barrysarll.livejournal.com]

Oh, and I taped PoN.

[johnnyvertigen.livejournal.com]

I ended up missing Die Another Day, surprised that you enjoyed Tomorrow Never Dies tho, it was just such a limp wristed run-through despite having Jonathan Pryce and an excellent idea.
Goldeneye is my favorite Bond. Perhaps this is due to overplaying the N64 game.

[darkmarcpi.livejournal.com]

OHMSS is my favourite Bond film, but then I'm a miserable goff, obv.